Home > Confession, Daily Life, Marriage, Obedience, Sin > I am Guilty: No More Finger Pointing

I am Guilty: No More Finger Pointing

Until recently, I have never realized how rare it is that I say, “I messed up.”, “I am to blame.”, “I choose to do it.”, “I am guilty.”

Just like Adam and Eve in Genesis 3:11-13, I play the “Blame Game”. When Adam and Eve sinned against God, He approached each of them as individuals. He questioned Adam, “Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?”, then Eve, “What is this that you have done?” And their response “The woman you gave me ate it!”, “The serpent deceived me! (paraphrased)” Finger Pointers.

By approaching them individually, God demonstrated that He holds one accountable for one’s own decisions (not for the circumstances or decisions of others)!

I’m sure I’ve been this prideful my whole life, but through marriage both God and Danny are exposing my eagerness to spread the blame & not take full responsibility. This shocked me at first, for I’ve always been “mature for my age” and “responsible”, etc. But, just because I try to do right in life, doesn’t mean I’m exempt from the responsibility when I do harm others or myself.

Lies I tell myself to cover-up my actions (such as fits of anger, overspending, a sharp tongue, etc):

  • You messed up first!
  • You made me do it!
  • I’m stressed – don’t expect me to act as if I’m not!
  • I have a right to be comfortable  & its not happening!
  • I tried to prevent this from happening!
  • What I did isn’t that bad!

The twisted part of in all of this, is many times my shift of blame may be true & accurate. Go back to Adam and Eve: God did give Adam the woman, she did eat the fruit, & the serpent did deceive her. They didn’t lie…per se, The fact that we can redirect attention to someone else and it be valid makes it so much easier to do so. Besides, who wouldn’t want to be the victim? The victim doesn’t have to fix something. The victim doesn’t have to repent. The victim is, well, innocent – right?

Today, I decide that it is better NOT to be the victim. It is better for me to be a guilty sinner. For, if I am at fault, forgiveness is near! Redemption is near! Glory is coming for me! The Scripture promises us in 1 John 1:9 that,

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

If I perceive that I’m not guilty, then I will not confess my sin. If I believe that I don’t need to confess anything, I suppose I also believe that I don’t need forgiveness from a righteous Judge…

But how foolish it would be of me to stand before the holy & just God who even clarifies in James 2:10 that,

…whoever keeps the whole law but fails in one point has become accountable for all of it.

How foolish it would be to stand before Him and say, “But, I am innocent… Oh, those times I messed up were because they were sinners, not me.”

I want to be humble. I want to be wrong when I’m wrong. I want to experience Christ’s abundant grace. I want to be the first to confess. I want to fess up even if no one else does. I want to be blamed, so that I can become blameless.

  1. March 26, 2013 at 11:59 AM

    Some of my inspiration came from the book, “Lies Women Believe” – I highly recommend it.

  2. mary sanderson
    March 26, 2013 at 2:26 PM

    I loved this, something we are all guilty of (no pun intended). My Dad allways said it takes a big person to appolagize, thats possibley why I tended to do that alot,  I called it catholic guilt..Lol.  I love the fact were staying in touch .I love you so very much & thankful my son met you, one of the best things to come out of the south.Lol 

    ________________________________

    • March 27, 2013 at 10:04 AM

      Yes, we are often told to apologize bc we are just suppose to or because of guilt. But, it is so pleasant to apologize because of freedom and gladness in God.

      Love you too! 🙂

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